This man - a hero?

I love what he said.
I love the way he said it.

I'm a coward.
He was brave.
I love the way he walked in water.

Apple Cake

Thursday afternoon, miserable outdoors,
- a mini-tornado in Kensal Rise, just
the other side of North London.
My cat and I stayed put. I made
an apple cake.

The mixture looked very dry. Added
a lot more milk. Gave it a good
beating. Started pouring scraping
the mixture into a tin -
AGHHHHHH - forgot the apple!

This proves there is a god out
there who
looks after my cake,
steers George's right hand when
he throws the switch,
disguises weapons of mass distruction,
waves his plonker, sorry - trident - over
the sea,
sends those I really
dislike to bake on the bottom self
in a low oven.

One large apple
later, grated, and all was ok.
Truely a miracle. My cat
is a true saint.
St. Milkshake, bless her.

passing comet

in the beginning
at the end, during the middle -
the start is a star;
falling trees;
fingers clawing turf;
flint and steel.
throw another log on the pyre.
let the sparks fly.
let's have another story...

Stick Figure Olympics

Foot race
Arms race
Faith race

et 2

2 bad...
2 late,
2 write
2 night.
2 morrow?
2 be honest,
2 much stuff about gods.
2 much of that sort of nonsense.
2 all of us, a good night's sleep.

small fry

This the SECOND TIME
that fish stall man in
Ridley Road Market
slipped me a whiting
in the bag of sprats
for tonight's supper

I want an A-POL
-OGY this instant.
Curse the unholy
fish seller and stall.
Burn his thin blue bags.
How dare he sell crab -
Burn, Bomb 'n Invade!
'n they sell pig in
the evil road 'n
women sell salad.

I DEMAND respect
for my fishy faith.

APOLOGISE NOW!!!

Believe Or Not

Bob 'n Meg were on dark rum 'n orange,
right by the door for a quick getaway.
Twenty-seven empty Guinness bottles
covered the little table at the back.
David started putting stools up shouting
"Time to go lads. Finish your drinks."

Outside, warm soft fish oil air 'n a lean,
first front, then back, on the rust-pitted rail.
Out of nowhere 'n over to the side,
Billy 'n Noel punching vicious lumps, torn
collars, blood spattered fronts 'n lips.

A heart-thumping fight, pulled apart, calmed down.
Billy heaved away, dismissively looked
at white shredded knuckles, dealt with his snot.
"You OK, Billy? What was that about?"
"He said Angels existed 'n I didn't."

carry on

45cm length,
35cm width
16cm depth

an alternative route
could be
a tamper-proof tank
on each plane
with copies of
bible, qur'ān ‘n
the complete works of shakespeare
suspended over
breakable compartments:
man’s piss
pig’s blood
‘n Jack Daniel’s?

iGod

A blinding flash struck me this afternoon
On the road back from Dalston
In the form of a spoof on an ‘iGod’
- solo use or networking
- downloadable add-ons
- multi faith
- skinnable [I liked that bit]
Lots of possibilities
Yes, something to work on
But when I got home I searched on Google
And it’s been done before...
Sold like hot cakes in Scotland and of course
God old U.S.A. was up for a few thousand
Is nothing sacred these days?
Maybe – try searching for ‘Goddle’?

waiting for godot

ot
do
what?

The One About The Curate And The Boat

Tuesday’s fishing boats were due so
We set off for the harbour maybe a
Few free mackerel or whiting the Da called
Whiting the chicken of the sea

By the yacht club just a house really
Jimmy had his boat upended said he was
Giving it a good clean and varnish
So we looked at him working away

The new curate pale pink ears sticking out
Came up behind us little cough and a pause
A fine afternoon and yes we heard it again
Giving it a good clean and varnish

So Sunday next we had a long sermon
Giving it a good clean ‘n varnish god ‘n ballyhoo
As usual the new curate went on far too long
So I’d better stop.

triangulation of ignorance

for the record
in a 3 sided square
bible
koran
torah
the sum of the arguments
on any 2 sides
is equal to that on side B

Religion

I’ve had it up to here with
God and the Devil
Enough
To laugh me a last time